You always know something is about to go down when you or a friend start a story off with this phrase. It’s either going to have you laughing until you catch a cramp/have an asthma attack OR leave you thinking about how messed up the situation turned out. Either way you know you are about to enjoy the story. So here goes…..
Funny story, I promise I can’t make it up. So today I was asked two questions: What are the benefits of being single? What am I doing while waiting (to get married)?
Now usually (with my three degrees and eight years of being an educator) I get a little ignorant when asked questions about my singleness. Why, you may ask? Well I look at every part of my life as being special, ESPECIALLY this state of singleness that I currently reside in. It doesn’t define me but at the moment it is who I am and how I am experiencing life. Like I said earlier I am in a committed relationship but until I have said my vows I am still considered single. No joint accounts, no sides of the bed, no his/her chairs (that sounds crazy because I would sit in his chair or lay in the middle of the bed just to tease him lol).
What are the benefits of being single? Sure my typical answer would be: I can do whatever I want, whenever I want, however I want (why? because I’m grown than a mugg….lmbo lol). Well of course that is the only benefit I need right? Na okay let’s be a grown up and look at this a little deeper. The greatest benefit about being single is learning yourself. I think that is the one thing I wished they taught little girls in little girl school (you know instead of waiting on your knight in shining armor and learning how to be a good old southern bell). I have had the greatest time figuring out who I am as a grown up. I know what I like/don’t like, how I like to make my sandwiches, that I don’t like folding clothes (that mountain….Lord), I love to travel, and I am a very effective disrupter/distractor. My quirky personality can light up a room and I get frustrated and hold in my stress. I have learned all these things just from living and being with myself. I have been able to learn who I am which is more than I can say for most people. But that’s another blog entry and I try not to judge so…..I”M GOING TO LEAVE THAT ALONE (yeah until I feel the need to write again lol you’re safe….for now :))
What am I doing while waiting? Lol I’m not waiting on nothing baby. I am living life on purpose! What do I look like waiting on something that may never happen (harsh reality isn’t it…)? I became aware of this reality after my grandparents passed away. I was so upset that they would never get to see me get married that I didn’t realize that they’d already witnessed me accomplishing so much with my life. Three graduations, countless appearances at collegiate track meets (they came to the majority of my home meets….i just cried a little), speaking engagements, buying a house, broken engagements, and experiencing life. They saw all this and cheered me on. They watched me experience life without waiting, and that’s how I see myself now. I am living my life on purpose. There is no sequence to life. There is no husband and wedding store that you go to after you have reached a certain point (that would be nice because I would pick Idris Elba on a white sand beach with my closest family and friends during Carnival!!!) While I am in this point in my life I want to be able to tell my future children (Lillian and Haus lol) that their mother was a beast at life and I lived it to the fullest. I don’t want my little girl to think that life doesn’t start until she gets married (Lillian would be to busy inventing something or training for some competition…who knows).
I guess what I am trying to say is this…..your life is what you make it, so why not live it? Life is but a brief moment in time, how will you use it? Will you be stuck wishing you were at a different moment or will you enjoy the path that you are on?