#lessonslearned First Comes Love Then Marriage…Then a Kid?!?!?

My eye

Day 6 and awwaaayyyy we go!! I’m proud of myself. Never would I have thought I would have made it this long with consistency (yes I know it’s only been 6 days). I’ll talk about that in tomorrow’s entry though. Today I want to talk about my hopes and dreams of one day having a kid. I’m so happy that God blessed me with a happy marriage and 2 amazing bonus kids. I promise I will seriously hurt someone over these two. Honestly they are the reason we aren’t in a big rush to have a little chocolate bundle of joy. But I can’t help but think what the little superhero would be like (yep that what he/she will be…have you not met me?)

Now I have a couple of things that I need people to know before I even think about getting preggo.

If I don’t ask then shhhhhhhhh……

I see this all the time, people giving women unsolicited advice while they are pregnant or about raising kids. What kind of egomaniac do you have to be to do this? That person has a whole support system that are full of educated or experienced individuals. Who are you to interject ideas and opinions on anyone else? If I don’t ask you then guess what don’t tell me nothing. You may think you are helping out but you have know clue what the whole situation is behind that mother and child.

I will love on my kid as much as I want

DON’T TELL ME MY CHILD WILL BE SPOILED IF I HOLD THEM TOO MUCH. Look black babies enter this world with SEVERAL setbacks. Why would I damage that baby anymore than what the world is going to do to them? So yes I will comfort them when they are sad. No I will not let them cry it out every single time. Do you know that’s how sociopaths are created. This is how you teach your children healthy emotional relationships and attachment. Oh and I’m not just talking about if I have a girl, nope this will happen with my boy as well. We need to teach both our sons and daughters that it’s okay to show emotions and feelings. Maybe this will cut down on the amount of broken unemotional adults that are passing their brokenness to others.

They can make all the messes they want

Studies have shown that children that are allowed to make messes to discover make better connections. They become better problem solvers. You can teach babies how to be messy and how to clean. So if you come in my house and we are both covered in shaving cream or water  don’t be worried. We might be having a drum solo on all the pots in the middle of the living room, just put in the complimentary ear plugs and mind your business. My baby will know that not all messes are bad and you can clean up just about anything. This the reason why my house has never been or will ever be NOT child friendly

If they don’t want to go to you guess what….

I shouldn’t have to explain this but here we go. Kids still have a built in sensor of “I’m not comfortable” and adults seem to ignore that to make other adults feel better. I refuse to take a baby that isn’t reaching for me, why because that child isn’t comfortable around me. So don’t get offended if I don’t make my kid go to you. I will respect my child’s boundaries.

If you haven’t figured it…I’m going to be that extra parent. Just warning you now. So for those who keep asking when, just know I’m going to be super extra. Make sure you tune into the podcast this Wednesday. As always I post it to the podcast page the next day. Please make sure you subscribe and like as you watch or listen on any major listening platforms spotify, apple podcast, or google podcast  

 

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