Dear Younger Self,
Where to begin? Look you amazing person you, if no one else tells you you’re amazing I will. You will accomplish so much, some of it for yourself and some to please others. But in the end, you will realize that it has shaped and molded you into a great person. I appreciate the lessons we have learned in our past and the story we have created for our life. Here are some lessons that you will have to keep learning.
Things will get tough but you are tougher
Look, girl, things will not always be perfect. You will fight to accomplish things people will never think you could do. That’s just you, you’re a fighter. There will be some things that you can’t fight and that’s okay. These lessons will teach you more about yourself than you beating them. Keep your head up, only smile when you want and sweat the small and large stuff but not for too long.
Just because you are the oldest doesn’t mean you can’t ask for help
I know you feel like you shouldn’t have to ask for help because you’re the oldest, but guess what THEY ARE YOUR PARENTS! Stop letting people think that you have to set the example by being a strong independent child. You are but you’re not. You still need your parents no matter how old you get. They are your support system just like they are everybody else’s. Ask for help, ask for guidance, hell ask for money and don’t feel guilty about it. There will come a time where you will pay them back (you do have to take care of them when they extra old and crusty). You are not above asking for help so stop stressing about what they will think about you because you need them just like they need you.
You really can do bad all by yourself but it’s better with a partner
As your Grandmother told you, you can do bad all by yourself, and guess what you do. You travel, you make big purchases, you live life and live it well. You will not wait for anyone to do anything, and that is why people don’t get you. It’s okay to traverse this life on your own but you won’t. God will send you friends that are willing to take the journey with you. They will love you with all your faults and foolishness. And just when you think you are good with everything God will send you a man that you didn’t pray for (and you were fighting to NOT be with). Why, even though you are amazingly awesome by yourself, you need other people.
Wear the freaking dress
Your body is amazing sis!! People are going to comment about how stacked you are. For some reason, the way you are shaped makes others uncomfortable. They will project their low self-esteem on you. Their shame will cause you to have body dysmorphia. Girl, you are thick THICK! (ooohhh, you should also buy this shirt here).
You may not appreciate it now but you will. You will love your curves. Once you understand that you are blessed and highly favored in that area the better off you’ll be. So wear that dress, show your mid-drift, wear those shorts, etc. There will be a time when you can’t so you might as well do it now and walk in confidence.
It’s okay to be happy even when others aren’t. Life is hard and things get tough. People aren’t going to like you and you may not like some people. It’s okay, you won’t be everybody’s cup of tea. That doesn’t mean you can’t be happy. Smile when you want, laugh when you can, and always be positive. Things will work out in the end so just be happy.
Click here to read how I finally began to accept my body for what it is. Also, make sure you tune in to the podcast next week to hear the wonderful blogger and stylist, The Almond Girl Styles, as we discuss self-worth and self-acceptance. You can catch it on the youtube channel or any major listening platform (apple podcast, google podcast, etc).