#lessonslearned The Self Abuse Stops Here

Hey kids and welcome to the New Year!!!! We are fabulously floating into the 2nd month of the year and everything is just amazing. Let me tell you between getting married (yea I OFFICIALLY have a husband…tuh ), seeing the love from all of our family and and launching a podcast things seems to be looking up. But honestly because of my personality and thought process I’m waiting for a the sky to fall or something horrible to happen. Why because god forbid that HE, meaning God, loves me that much to just be freaking happy. But I have to remind myself that God really does love me THAT much and I really do deserve to be happy.

That leads to today’s topic…..Self abuse: beating yourself down because you failed or didn’t meet a goal or you just don’t think you deserve to be as happy as you are at the moment. As you can see I am guilty of this. Why….I don’t actually know. But here are ways I combat it…..
1. I forgive myself- doesn’t even matter if I did someone wrong or if I missed a deadline. I forgive myself and move on to the next task.
2. I improve self talk- no need to call myself a failure and stay in a place of self imposed shame. Nope I think about things I did correct in the situation and focus on that. Instead talking down on myself I tell myself “Hey ot may have not turned out the way you wanted it to but guess what you handled this, this and this a lot better than what you would have in the past”. See make the switch from negative to positive.
3. I implement positive rewards for positive behaviors but I don’t punish myself for mistakes. Yep I give myself a pat on the back for the positives. That goes along with #2.
4. I make myself move forward whether things go right or wrong. No need to wallow in the past, whether it happened 5 years ago or 5 minutes, I have to keep progressing.
I found that stopping self abuse helped me understand that everyone isn’t perfect, I gained a lot of patience and it helped me to find the good in others. Treat yourself better, the world is already hard enough. Why make it harder by abusing yourself?

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